4th Of July Lessons From Simon To Keep Cool This Holiday
Simon is your average Joe - he's your next door neighbor, your mailman, maybe even your uncle or cousin. He goes through the motions of his life: taking care of the house, going camping, and enjoying his daily activities. Unlike your next door neighbor, though, Simon encounters some unlucky situations. Take a look below at some 4th of July themed lessons Simon has learned the hard way - so you don't have to.
If You're Going To The Beach This Independence Day...
1. Check The Weather
This should probably go without saying, but you should check the weather before you go. Simon made this mistake once or twice. He was so ready to get swimming in the water and sunbathe at the beach. As soon as he got there, the clouds rolled in and it began to rain. If Simon had checked the weather, he would have had a much better day for sure.
2. Practice Water Sports Safely
Simon eventually found a dry and hot beach day, perfect for jet skiing. He got onboard, was riding the waves, and was enjoying life...until he fell off and landed in the water with a hard belly flop. Ouch, right? Well, take it from Simon, practice makes perfect - especially when it comes to jet skiing.
3. Only Go In The Water When Lifeguards Are Present
Another day, Simon went to the beach and headed in the water. The sun was out and the ocean looked beautiful. Unfortunately, he ran past the closed lifeguard stand. This time, unlucky Simon lucked out, but he learned his lesson - without a lifeguard present, swimming can be super dangerous.
4. Watch Where You Swim
Simon just can't catch a break! He went back to the beach, the lifeguard was present, and he went for a swim again. He felt something brush his foot and shoot it off - probably seaweed. Then, a pinch. It was a crab! When he got out of the water, there were crabs everywhere! Instead of haphazardly going in the water, always look for signs there might be living creatures around. From crabs to sharks, it's always best to be aware of your surroundings!
If You're Staying Home And BBQing This 4th Of July...
1. Be Aware Of Your Surroundings
Simon, like you, planned to have a great 4th of July. He fired up the grill and began to flip some burgers and hot dogs. He turned away to get a drink of beer when his dog swiped it right off of the grill. Simon will be the first to tell you that he was looking forward to the burger that Rover ate. Keep an eye on your pets and other outdoor predators while grilling.
2. Use Propane Wisely
If it's your first time firing up the grill, you should probably read up on fire safety on the BBQ. If you don't, you might end up like Simon. Simon hit the grill the other day and the grill almost burst into flames. You could say that his burger was pretty well done. Always keep a fire extinguisher next to the grill and the kids far, far, away.
3. Keep Your Condiments Stocked
There's nothing more frustrating than leaving your own party to go to the store. Last year, Simon had a 4th of July party, and he had to go back to the grocery store to get more ketchup. It held up everyone who wanted to eat and he was feeding tons of hungry people. Let Simon teach you that it's always better to have more condiments than less.
4. Keep Your Alcohol Stocked
Just like the condiments, it's always better to have tons of alcohol. Two years ago, Simon ran out of alcohol. You should have seen how many angry drunk people there were. Sure, he went and restocked, but the party just wasn't the same after that. Don't be like Simon - keep the alcohol going all night long.
5. Check The Weather...Again
See number one - you should have learned your lesson at the beach, Simon! The people you're with won't be very happy if they have to eat their hamburgers in the rain.
This summer, let Simon be your guide! Stay tuned for more tips and tricks on getting through life effortlessly with Simon - he's been through it all.
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